If They Fall

I remember sitting in my room, my parents had added the bedroom in the garage for me and really allowed me to make it mine.  Walls were white, carpet red and everything else black, red and white.  I enjoyed having my own space.  I do not remember what the argument was about but I clearly remember the break up scene. I got home, hoping my sister was there, and ended up alone in my tears.

Looking back on it now it seems so dramatic and unrealistic; yet when we are living it the world seems to be crashing down on us.  I have had to use those emotions to relate to my children in the same circumstances. The fact that I know they will be fine and its very rare that you marry that high school love interest does not help them.  Validating their feelings and giving them the time and space to explore it for themselves is clearly good for all of us.  

I always make the joke that my children tell me everything but I would not have it any other way.  I love the fact that I know their friends, their enemies and what is going on with them.  I'm not crazy - I know there are things that they do not share with me.  Somehow knowing what they do tell me eases my mind.  

Exploring life, love and learning is a difficult road for anyone.  Having the open door policy in my house has kept all of us close.  My children learned years ago that I do not lie.  There are times when they utilize that fact.  Those are usually the same times I say "it's none of your business".  The other thing that I believe has made us the fabulous four is my kids know that I have no problem saying I'm sorry or I was wrong.  This small fact changed how they viewed me and how they fostered the relationships we have today.  

As parents we don't know it all, but we know enough to allow our children to feel.  Giving them that freedom opens up so much more for them.  I am not saying let go.  I am saying ease up the reigns - we can always pick them up if they fall.