Boundaries

Every time I think that I have it all figured out it seems that something happens to convince me otherwise.  My biggest issue?  Boundaries.  I truly need to practice what I preach on this one and perhaps even read the book again for the 5th or 6th time.

Although I don't worry what others think, anymore, I do worry about how things look to me.  Prime example this last weekend.  I know that my ex sees me as the enemy and doesn't realize half of the things I have done to help him with his relationship with his children.  I know he is positive that I feed my children their emotions.  Oh, how wrong he is.

This last week was my ex's birthday.  I, alone, took him to dinner on Thursday night after our sons football game.  He, of course, wanted our children for his birthday weekend, neither wanted to go.  My daughter, who is struggling through therapy, gave into going, however our son did not.  This is where my boundary issue came in.  I am completely aware that I do not have to do anything for him, as I am no longer his wife.  Yet, all I could imagine was him sitting alone in his house on his birthday.  My anxiety went through the roof.  Not because of my vision of his weekend but because I couldn't allow it to be like that.  So, I did it.  I invited him over to watch football, I cooked him dinner, got a cake and even got gifts from the kids to him.  Someone, very nicely pointed out, that he would never do that for me.  I don't care.  I have to do what I feel is right.  How do I balance that with the boundaries I need to maintain my sanity?  I don't have the answer, yet, but I'm working on it...