Control

Unable to control all that is going on around me is a terrible feeling.  I suppose I never thought myself to be a control freak.  Don't get me wrong, I am completely aware of my ability to control things, it is the fact that I was unaware of how strongly I needed to do so. 

Have you ever heard the bath tub theory?  Years ago my doctor told me that I had a large bath tub. I could handle a great deal of things at once.  I was able to juggle many things.  Unfortunately it came to a point where my bath tub was over flowing and I had zero additional capacity.  I had to find a way to release some of the water in my tub. 

This brings up so many things.  Not just the control issue but also the fact that I am the type of individual that likes to handle things as they come.  I have many people around me that are more the "ignore it and it will go away" types.  Nothing annoys me more.  Had I been able to handle many all of the issues around me I do not think I would be in the place I sit today........overwhelmed.

My decision?  Massage.  Today I am getting a massage.  Perhaps then I can think straight and attack one item at a time.  Wish me luck!